chad swanzy

I respect youth leaders and the diversity of opinions on how they lead in youth ministry.

An area of practice I can’t respect is the area of the way the conversation about the differences unfold. Let me explain.

The conversations tend to narrow the categories into two groups; youth groups that integrate fun and events and then youth groups that integrate theology and community. When a conversation happens there is usually no middle ground and all inclusive statements are leveraged. Example: “All youth groups that play games are only interested in entertaining kids.” Or, “all youth groups who focus on theology and community are boring kids right out of the church and dismissing lost kids.” Usually the words are different. Instead of fun and events it’s just called entertainment by those against it. Instead of theology and community it’s often called holy huddles for those who are against it.

And, I use the phrase, “against it” because that’s often how the average post is written. The mentality of conversation is us vs. them or the right way and the wrong way. It’s just awkward to hear youth leaders throw things out like this about each other.

The other thing that happens in this conversation that I loathe is what I’m going to call, “passing the Barna Ball.” The Barna Ball is that multi-church wide census report out there that came to the conclusion that kids are leaving the church when they get out of high school. It’s a concern, indeed. But youth are not the only ones who leave church, become disengaged, disgusted, or distracted. Fear has created blame and blame is being shouldered on method and style for a three to six year window in the life of a believer as opposed to the full spectrum reality that young professionals, soccer moms, and Millennial adult men increasingly find no compelling reason to participate in the American church. 

The idea that an adult’s pathway to organized expressions of church or church membership and participation are directly linked to the manner and means in which their youth group’s style was applied to their teen years is irrational. Obviously, circumstances of abuse are instances of exception but students are capable and do leave churches on both sides of the argument. In all of the debate there has been no silver bullet. No church, group, or style advocate has been able to present case study, research, or field tested evidence that one is better than the other. To say, “it’s not working.” is not a valid argument unless you can say what is working. You could say, “it’s not working enough.” Or, “it needs to be better.” If at anytime we can say, “this is perfect. we found the best way to do ministry and it’s working.” Then I think we’re in trouble.

The other part of the argument is the idea that “holy huddles” can’t experience fun or “entertainment” ministries have no substance. I think there is more diversity among the two styles for both, who are experiencing good things and trying to figure it out.

Is there any logic to the fact that God is sovereign. It’s not as if he’s taken back by statistical results. He’s not off guard with the diversity and beauty of the bride. He isn’t standing idle with his hands off the reigns. He is working. He promised it and he’s not a liar. I would suggest that it will never be about style. 

It has and always will be about believers responding to their cultural context with the Gospel. Construct a view out of the way Jesus pursued the lost and broken. It will probably end up not looking like anything on either side of the style debate.

Every month since this past December I’ve been publishing talk series for our Stash Subscribers. For $5 a month we deliver full talk notes, discussion guides and graphics. The talks are designed for the furthest student out and our written with one central point, support, and scripture. They are straightforward and delivered with easy first steps that students can walk away with and apply.

If you subscribe today I will get you caught up for free. You can cancel at anytime if you feel we don’t deliver value and great content. You can either choose to pay for a full year upfront or pay monthly. If you would rather buy the series individually you can always do so in our store as I post up.

Just wanted to fill you in on the subscriber calendar below. As always, I will post great content for free to help you with outside of our subscription.

4 Weeks on the Under Age Drinking Students will be challenged to look at the motive and false coping behind alcohol. It brings hope and healing for teens who struggle with the party as a sense of identity and gives them healing over past hurt. You Missed this one but you can buy it now.

2 Week series for Valentines This series helps students with broken hearts and gives them direction on how to be loved well and love as Christ would. You missed this one but you can buy it now.

4 Weeks on Healing for Broken Families (coming in feb.) For students who are the only believer in their family they will be given direction for being on mission, being patient, and leading by example for the ones they care the most about.

Off month surprise series. March

4 Weeks for New Believers (coming April) Students will look at the life Jesus has called them to, selflessness, mission, and relationship.

Off month surprise series. May

4 Weeks for the Power of Words (coming in June) Students will come to know the power of their words and the potential pain they can give by speaking life or death.

Off month surprise series. July

4 Weeks for Who Jesus Really Is (coming in Aug.) Students will be introduced to the person of Christ and pushed away from moralism and pluralism to what God says about himself.

Off month surprise series. September

4 Weeks on Entitlement (coming in Oct.) Students will wrestle with what reality brings and what life looks like in balance.

Off month surprise series. November

4 Weeks on Biblical Community for Students (coming in Dec.) A discussion on accountability, confession, giving, and pursuing.

Off month surprise series. January

This past week I had the privilege of going to Orlando, Florida to participate in the All Staff Conference for Younglife. This conference happens once every four years. All of the staff from around the globe descend on Orlando to gather for encouragement, vision, and fun. I might unpack that conference for you in another post. They rented out Sea World people! Brought in Jeff Foxworthy, who is also a YoungLife leader, handed out swag, and gave everyone free passes for a day at Disney, Universal, or the Spa. They take care of their people.

At the conference I was asked to be a part of a panel on social media. I had about eight minutes to summarize trends with teens and how they use social media. I could have talked abou this for an hour so I had to be selective. In fact, I’ve decided to start a regular installment on social media and tech on Tuesday as part of the Stash offering.

Here are some points I conveyed.

Hey friends, I wanted to post up a sample of the first week of a two week series for Valentine’s I’m releasing today to our Stash Subscribers. If you haven’t subscribed I would encourage you to do so. Last month subscribers got the four week series, “Smashed” on under age drinking. Next month subscribers get a four week series on healing for broken families. This month they are getting a sereis called, “I’m with Stupid.” Here’s an excerpt. If you’re interested in getting fresh content written for the furthest out kid, subscribe.

Week 1 - I’m With Stupid – “What Stupid Did.”

Preview

(In the place of the story below you will need to recall a similar situation for yourself. If however you do use this story you can simply say to your students, “I have a friend who shared this story with me recently.”)

In fourth grade I was like any other boy. I loved hanging out with friends, exploring creeks, building forts, and playing with toys. Those were the good old days. Right? You guys ever think about elementary school while you’re sitting in algebra or chemistry? Remember when you had recess? Remember “not” having homework? Anybody miss crayons, crayon boxes, elmer’s glue, and stuff like that? I guess for some of you you still have crayons, you just call it tumblr.

One of the things that you can also probably remember is the thought that you once believed girls had “coodies” and boys were mean and disgusting. I guess boys are probably still mean and disgusting. Ha ha! We use to play red rover at my school during recess. You make two lines facing each other and then hold hands in your line to form a chain. When a team takes a turn they chant, “Red Rover, Red Rover, let Lucy come over.” Any of you remember that game? At my school it was always guys vs. girls because no self-respecting boy would willingly hold the hand of a girl in front of his homies. If a girl ran toward your team you would go “Braveheart” on her locking hands tight to insure that she wouldn’t break your chain so that you weren’t the weakest link. If you had to, you might clothesline her and send her straight into the ground. “Happy birthday to the ground! You can’t buy me hot-dog man!” Dirty.

In fourth grade however something really strange happened to me. There was this new girl at school, Megan McDonald. Megan was the very first girl I ever noticed. I remember the first time I saw her. Megan was in another fourth grade class and so it took me a while to discover her. One day between classes going to lunch I went to my locker to get my lunch pail and when I turned around I noticed on the other side of the hallway this beautiful color of red. The color of red in my eyes began to take shape. This gorgeous wavy red hair rolled down from a princess shaped crown over a baby-blue scarf and precious my little pony pink sweater… like a billowy beautiful cloud. I had not seen Megan’s face just yet but for the first time I was intrigued. I watched as this stunning warm sunny cloud put books away like a ballerina. I stood motionless in the hallway watching her until she finally turned around to head toward the lunchroom. The very first thing I noticed after her long flowing gorgeous head of red hair was her deep beautiful blue eyes. Looking like a deer in the headlights here eyes finally made contact with mine. Have you guys ever heard this old school 80’s band called “Air Supply?” They sang this song that went kind of like this… “Don’t say the morning comes, don’t say the morning comes… so soo-oo-oon. Must we end this way when so much here is hard to loo-oo-oo-oose. Love is everywhere I know it is… such moments as this are too few… oh, it’s all up to you… it’s all up to you. HERE I AM! THE ONE THAT YOU LOVE. LOVES YOU IN SO MANY WAYS!!!” (I would challenge you to sing this song or a similar song you know in front of your kids.)

I was struck ya’ll. Megan a-ffected me. As I stood motionless in the hallway watching her head toward the lunchroom my best friend Martin tapped me on the shoulder. It was like the stereotypical record scratch to my romantic theme song playing in my head. “Bro… what are you doing?” “Uh… nothing!” Let’s go to lunch. Yeah, fellas… that was it! That was the moment that I officially left the “coodie club.” I sat in the lunchroom with my friends positioned in such a way that I could see her over my friend’s shoulders. Guys, Megan ended life. You know what I’m talking about? Megan ended it bro. She was a sucker punch to the face of toys, forts, killing frogs, tripping girls, and all that other stuff. That world ended in 1983 at Dover Elementary in Richardson, Texas. Forget about it. Done-zo. Finished! Terminated!

I remember that the single most important moment of my day was recess where all of the classes were together on the field. “Red Rover” was a defining moment for me. I had to hide it in my eyes as I locked hands with my bros and screamed, “Red Rover, Red Rover… send Megan on over!” I did not go to church back then but I was a praying man girls. I was heart full of prayer ladies! “Please run to me… run to me… run to me… run to these arms girl. Run to these arms baby!” When she ran to my chain I held the softest most forgiving grip ever. The first day she broke my chain and I got to hold her hand…. Dang!” I’m about that. I’m about that.

Purpose

We’re starting a teeny-tiny two-week series on love. Love. It’s kind of a double-edged four-letter word. Never has a word held so much promise and at the same time so much pain. The series of conversations we’re going to have is called, “I’m with Stupid.” Does love ever make you feel like you’re powerless and stupid? Some of you have been so struck, so locked-up, and so sucker-punched in the face with someone that you would have changed your entire life to chase after that person. You remember that very first crush don’t you? You know where you were when you saw “him” or when you saw “her.” They changed your world. What also changed your world was the very first time you felt the sting of pursuing someone and having your heart ripped straight out of your chest, crumpled into a million bits, and stomped on in front of the whole world. You seemingly went from on top of it all to the bottom of the deepest pit covered in pain and loneliness.

Isn’t it amazing what love can do to you? Love is like inviting someone to hang out with you everywhere you go to take over your decisions, your time, your thoughts, your heart, your emotions, your brain, reason, priorities, logic, and body. At the same time “love” could help you make the best decision in your life, it can also cause you to make the dumbest decision with your life. It will leave you thinking,

“I’m with Stupid.”  

Purpose Recommendation

As we have this conversation I want to point out to you the fact that “Love” is that friend and sometimes enemy that may have left you feeling insecure, alone, disappointed, broken, and hurt. It’s going to sometimes feel like to you that I’m inviting you to bring up old hurt or maybe even current realities about times where your life feels desperately out of control. I would never want to make you feel “stupid.” In fact I want to help you step away from your friend, “Love” and take a moment alone to think for yourself, your dreams, your future, and your ideas. While we have this conversation I want you focus on two things.

1. You may be with stupid right now and you may not know it. – When you’re with stupid, stupid has a way of blinding you. When stupid feels threatened things get escalated and defenses are built to make sure you don’t do anything to compromise “love.” Be careful when that happens that you don’t rush to conclusions. Just listen.

2. You may have been with stupid and you’ve made the decision that you will never ever be with stupid again. You’ve given up on love, the thought of commitment, and the hope that you will one day find someone who has “forever” on their mind, character in their words, and selflessness in their motive. Don’t give up on love. You can rewrite history with the right pen and the right paper.